Honda, take this idea and run with it

I have reached that point of Winter at which I feel I can't go on. I have done my time. Shoveled my drive, driven my kids to the school that is in our backyard because it's just so cold, kept my windows closed and my heater on.
Enough. I'm out. Winter wins. Again.
I can feel the weight of it on my chest. I just want to open a freakin' window already.
Thanks, I just had to get that out there in the world so maybe the snow Gods would turn things around and shine a little sunshine on me.
In other thoughts from my brain. I am in the market for a new mini-van that has a partition between the front and backseats.
How awesome would that be. My kids loose their minds when we get in the car. Before we even pull out of the driveway someone is bored and someone has touched or breathed on someone that didn't want touched or breathed on.
I think I would be a better mom if my car had a partition. I know I would be a less distracted driver.
It's really just a safety issue.
It could be see-through, and I could have an intercom on my side. Just in case.
My husband drives limos and of course they have the partition, which he uses regularly.
Although, sometimes people want the partition down, and then they do things that would make Jenna Jamison blush.
Here is a piece of advice for all of you that may ride in limos at some point in the future. What happens in the limo does NOT stay in the limo.
The limo driver entertains all of his neighbors with stories about you and your crazy porn-star behavior.

Anyway, I digress.
I want a partition in my next mini-van and I think that there would be a market for this. Either a partition or a really long stick that I could use to knock my kids on their silly little heads.

Too funny to not share

So I was taking Stella to dance last night and because of the crazy amounts of snow we have had lately I was having a really hard time finding a parking spot.
One, because her dance studio is in Uptown which is small, home to a college campus, busy and has mostly street parking.
Two, because apparently people loose their freakin' minds when it snows and cannot appropriately judge distance between parking spaces without the aid of the white lines (which are still somewhat covered with snow). So, even in the parking lots without the lines it some how becomes okay to park diagonally in the parking space.
I was making my third loop around the block and trying to make a left. Traffic cleared and I started my turn when some ass flew out of his spot on the curb and cut me off.
This is the conversation the followed.

Me: Jesus Christ!

Stella: (leaning forward from the back seat trying to see out the front window) Really? Is it him?!?

Me: What?

Stella: Was that really Jesus Christ? I think I saw him too.

Me: Laughing.

Ok. So I don't typically cuss in front of the kids and I try really hard not to take JC's name in vain, but this cracked me up. She was so serious and so excited.
I tried to explain what had happened, but she was just really focused on her Jesus sighting.


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The 4year old boy I watch is pissed off because I won't let him play the Wii all freakin' day. He is taking it out on the dog and his sister.
He keeps pushing the dog off the couch and 'accidently' hitting him. I wish the dog would at least growl at him
I am about ready to knock him in his silly 4 year old noggin.
Just another example of why 4 seems to suck ass.
He is also watching Diego and he keeps call him a "not knower", and bitching about how much he has to help Diego do everything.

Tough choices

Thanks to all for the support offered up following my last post.
The boy that I watch lost his cool again and I made the call to his Mom to let her know I was officially done at this point.
If it was just me, I would have stuck it out with him, but I have to put the safety of my kids and the smaller kids that I watch as my first priority.
Also, his Mom somewhat refuses to address his new behavior that was throwing me for a loop. She insists that it is a natural thing to want to do.
Fine. Agreed. But, as for all things, there is an appropriate time and place.
My home is not the place.
Anyway, he made it a tiny bit easier on me when he completely lost his cool. He kicked and punched the walls and stuck his finger in my face. I could have handled all of that, but then he turned his anger toward Miles.
Sorry. Done.
I wish the best for him. I just know that I have come to the point where I can no longer be of any help.

Some things I have been thinking about

Just some highlights of what is causing the swirlyness in me head....

The teen aged developmentally delayed kiddo that I watch in the afternoon has hit puberty. He wants to do some things that he did not before. He wants 'privacy' for these activities, but will proceed regardless.
This is problematic for several reasons.
Umm, not in my house. Please.
I have three other kiddos that I watch, plus my three and I don't want to have to explain to them what he is wanting to do. Not yet.
He gets very angry when he is unable to do his business. He has gotten big and has several inches on me in height and outweighs me.
I am afraid it is time to find alternative care for him, but I do feel guilty because for years he has been welcome in my home and enjoyable to have around.
I am not sure how I am going to proceed.

I had a CT scan. I had my gallbladder out a little over a year ago. I felt great, until all the symptoms came back.
I put off going to the doctor, because I was worried.
The CT sucked. They could not get an IV in me. It took forever.
Now I am anxiously awaiting results.
I hate waiting.

I have been doubting my parenting skills lately. Mostly in the 'how am I dealing with autism' arena.
Do I do enough? Could I suck more at getting paperwork done? How much longer can I stand the crazy eye from the nurse when I explain that I do not under any circumstances want any more vaccines for my kids?

So I am doing what I do worst. Waiting and trying not to worry or over think.
What do you think?

If you don't have anything nice to say...

Did your Mom ever hit you with that diddy?
"If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."
I know I heard it growing up and I say it to my kids. Only I have shortened it to, "If you don't have anything nice to say, shut it."
This is what is going on with me lately. I don't have anything to say. Nothing.
It swirls in the brain, but can't seem to make it to the page.
I'm trying. I intend on being back, once I have something to say again.