Lord forgive me please.

I find a lot of my prayers begin with this initial request. "Lord, please forgive me."
"Forgive me for wishing my kids would just be quiet. Forgive me for yelling. Forgive me for fantasizing about running away and starting that new life. The life where no one calls me 'Mama' and no one needs a single thing from me and I am back in school and preferably living very near the beach."
I am thankful my God is a forgiving God. I need to be forgiven. I am thankful some fantasies are never fulfilled.
Today, on our way to church, Miles said "Mom, show me a happy face."
This is what he says when the face has been too angry for too long. I responded with a smile that was too toothy and big to be taken as the real thing, and then I quietly prayed.
"Lord, please forgive me. For my impatience and for my feelings of frustration over kids just being kids. Forgive me for the curses I thought about my husband, as he is already at church doing your work, and he was not there to help poke and prod the kids through breakfast, oh Lord."
I know that he heard me.
I apologized to the kids for the harsh rush out the door.
"Sorry guys for the angry face and the too loud words, but please next Sunday let's plan better."
They too are so forgiving.
We got home feeling better for the prayers and the fellowship. We bundled up and took the pup to the park. We ran a lot. We stopped for ice-cream on the way home.
I am working on forgiving myself. That is the hardest forgiveness to come by.